SEX THERAPY FOR COUPLES & INDIVIDUALS IN NORTH CAROLINA
Helping you discover the sex you’ve always wanted.
Many of us grew up learning that sex was unsafe, wrong, or something to be ashamed of. We’re here to help you unlearn that, and build something better.
WHY YOU’RE HERE
Sex is a problem to be managed, or so you were taught.
Maybe that came from a school system that only taught you what not to do. Maybe it came from a religious community that treated desire as sin and your body as a source of danger. Maybe it came from experiences that weren't safe — where someone crossed a line they shouldn't have. However you got here, the message was the same: sex is a problem to be managed, not a part of yourself to explore.
We were taught what not to do, but not how people talk about sex, understand it, or share it with others.
We believe that fear and shame around sex— found in schools, religious spaces, and social media— cause many of the problems people come to sex therapy for, such as:
Trouble getting or keeping an erection
Pain during sex, including vaginismus and vulvodynia
Healing after sexual experiences that were not consensual
Trouble feeling aroused
When you and your partner want different things from sex — and don't know how to talk about it.
Learning how to handle and communicate about sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
A DIFFERENT DEFINITION
What do we mean when we say sex?
Many of us learn that sex is a euphemism for vaginal intercourse. We want to help you expand the definition of sex into something broader, more accessible.
While sexuality is certainly informed by our cultures, individual psychologies, and families of origin, there’s also a biological component of sexuality.
Our sexual physiology is connected with what’s called the parasympathetic nervous system. Sex activates the same part of your nervous system responsible for rest and connection.
Sex is the act of pursuing pleasure in our bodies,
often with the bodies of others.
Sex therapy may involve the following.
Every session is tailored to your individual or relational needs. Here's a sense of what that work looks like in practice.
Physical engagement & pleasure
If genital play is something that's important to you, we can strategize about how to create pleasurable, connective, and enjoyable interactions for everyone involved.
Bringing more play in
We'll strategize how you and your partner(s) can periodically step away from the grind and obligations of life and move into spaces of enjoyment and laughter.
Exploring different options
Sexual problems often develop when a couple has sex in the same way. We'll brainstorm different approaches to create a sexual relationship that aligns with your values and needs.
Finding rest and safety
We'll help you find strategies for creating and communicating with more calmness, structure, and collaboration.
We hope you leave sex therapy with:
These aren't guarantees, they're the shifts we've seen happen most consistently in clients who do the work.
A better understanding of your body
We'll ask about what feels good for your body, what you might want the purpose of sex to be, and how you might transition into and out of a sexual space.
More direct communication
We'll practice how you might ask for what you want, how to listen and receive what someone else might want, and how to manage the anxiety that arises when you want different things.
More comfort with vulnerability
For many folks, sexuality confronts our deepest fears: rejection and abandonment. Sex therapy will help you work through those fears, not around them.
More curiosity
Sex is not something that you perform. It's something that you create, with yourself and other people. You'll become a kinder, more gracious teammate.
A relationship that actually works better
If a couple can talk about sex well, they can talk about anything well. We'll also periodically address conflict resolution, finances, parenting, and family relationships.
Ready to find out?
Schedule a free 30-minute consultation — no pressure, no commitment.
Schedule now
How it works
What predicts success in sex therapy
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1
Use the session to gameplan how you want to solve problems differently.
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2
Create time outside of sessions to practice what we agreed upon together.
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3
Check in with each other to see what's working and what to improve upon.
Goal-oriented, solution-focused
We'll start by naming short and long-term outcomes for your relationship and each person in it. Sessions are typically 50 or 80 minutes, though we may find during the consultation that a longer initial session makes sense.
At the end of each session, we'll offer ideas and experiments to try. The folks who make the most progress are the ones who practice between sessions and bring back what they noticed.
As therapy evolves, we'll talk regularly about what's working (so we can do more of it) and explore what might be getting in the way.
Licensed in NC & MA — and beyond
We are licensed psychotherapists for residents of Massachusetts and North Carolina, offering both in-person sessions in Raleigh and virtual sessions statewide.
We also offer sex coaching for couples nationwide who have experienced harm from an Evangelical, Mormon, or Pentecostal community. Learn more about religious trauma therapy.